Worthy

This past Saturday, I had the pleasure of attending a special event, the Radiant Gala. Photographer Jessica Yates had sought women to highlight in what she named “The Worthy Campaign.” After receiving applications, she selected 25 women to photograph and document their stories. I was blessed to be chosen as one of the subjects for this project. Saturday night was the culmination of this campaign and the unveiling for the 25 women Jessica selected to highlight.

I thought back to the photo shoot that took place the day before my 45th birthday. I had just opened a card from my mother that she sent to tear me down and certainly not to celebrate her daughter’s birthday. So “worthy” was not what I went into that day feeling. Jessica and her stylist were so kind and attentive as they prepared me to be photographed. We talked and they asked me questions about my experiences that brought me to be in this campaign. It was equally hard and cathartic. As the camera clicked its mechanical song, Jessica was so encouraging with the beauty her photographer’s eye sees. I’m not one to feel comfortable with receiving praise, but her genuine support was the balm I needed that day. I remember two things she said to me as we poured our time into poses. The first was, “When you don’t smile, your eyes are so deep with your experiences.” The second was, “You have an internal light that radiates from you.” That contrast she had observed stayed with me. The darkest depths I have found myself in, I wouldn’t wish on anyone, and if there is a light that radiates, then it comes from being in God‘s presence. The photo shoot finished and I returned home lighter than when I arrived. 

Fast forward to this past Saturday, I arrived to the gala ready to celebrate the unveiling of “The Worthy Campaign” with seven of my wonderful friends. When I saw my picture on the wall, I stopped short. For the photo shoot, and in honor of my September birthday, I had made myself a sapphire blue dress and accessorized with a sapphire jeweled tiara.  Seeing me in that dress, lit in such a way that I looked absolutely radiant, brought me to a dead stop. I thought, that is how my Heavenly Father sees me. Regal, beautiful, and yes, worthy.  My friends with me echoed this sentiment. 

That night held interviews and speakers, and towards the end of the event, Jessica had all of us from the campaign lineup for a group photo. As we stood there receiving instructions as they made sure the photo would come out nicely, the song “The Truth” began to play over the speakers. I was struck once more by the love the Heavenly Father has for me. He loves with a special love, but he also loves each woman standing next to me from the campaign with a special love. He loves each woman in that room with a special love, and all his children everywhere. I was overwhelmed in that moment on stage and tears streamed down my face, even as I tried to abide to the request to smile for the camera. What a good, good God!

You might ask, if God loves all of His children everywhere then how can it be special? It is special because it is more than a blanket love, it is an individual love. He knows you completely. He sees even into the heart of who you are, and He loves you for how special you are to Him. I know I am beautiful in His sight, even as the scars add up and wrinkles form. I am noble in his sight, even when the world calls me a pauper. Above all this, I am worthy because the Lord of the universe has decreed it to be so.

To anyone reading this, you are worthy and greatly loved. Be uplifted by that truth.

“Let all that I am praise the Lord; with my whole heart, I will praise his holy name. Let all that I am praise the Lord; may I never forget the good things he does for me. He forgives all my sins and heals all my diseases. He redeems me from death and crowns me with love and tender mercies. He fills my life with good things. My youth is renewed like the eagle’s!”
‭‭Psalms‬ ‭103‬:‭1‬-‭5‬ ‭NLT‬‬